Well that guy is a bloke named Harry Taylor and he’s about to go to jail for leaving a mock “No More Nails” ad featuring a smiling Jesus on the cross in the prayer room at John Lennon airport in Liverpool.  I can’t get a copy of the ad he used without stealing it, but here’s an example of the joke that really got him in hot water:

So, for starters… cool! There’s a John Lennon airport in Liverpool!

Two, my point in posting both the mock ad and the video is that this joke is not new by any stretch of the imagination.  Using Christ on the cross in an ad for liquid nails is one of those jokes that everybody swears they thought of first, like when the news came out that they were going to build a wall around Mexico and people said, “who will they get to build it?”  It’s an easy leap… I’ll give you points for it, but don’t get cocky kid.

Now, our hero is actually not going to jail for creating this ad… otherwise they would have to round up half of England.  No, no, this man is being sent to jail for being a dick and leaving a joke that we all know as being distasteful to religious folk in the friggin’ prayer room at an airport.

So, kids, the moral here is, want to stay out of jail? Don’t be a dick.

J.

Related posts:

1. Don’t use digital media because it makes the baby Jesus cry
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Anyway, while I was in old London town, I remember seeing these ads on my way to and from the airport, but I didn’t have a chance to get any pictures of them.  Luckily enough, they have taken on a life of their own here on the net, so I don’t really need to bother.

Here’s the original ad in all its schmaltzy glory…

I guess these ads aren’t all that bad from a design front, but there’s just something weird about the message. I guess that’s why they are seeing responses like this around town (warning, there’s a big old C-word a comin’ round the bend!):

"I never voted Tory before, because I'm not a cunt."

A few years back, I actually dated and lived with a woman who was raised a Republican and never really bothered to question what it was all about when she grew up.  This was back when Little George W was running for office.

We used to have these funny conversations about why she was voting for him that would always end with her saying that maybe we shouldn’t discuss politics.  My problem was always that, when I asked her why she was voting for him, she would say things like, “well, he’s really for education…”  My response was always, “…and Gore is against education?”, while scrunching up my face and looking at her like she was a crazy person.

I think that’s my problem with these ads.  By stating things like, “I like their plans to help families,” it makes it sound like the opposing parties (there are a crap load there, but let’s say “Labor” just to pick one) sound like they are somehow anti-family or anti-family program or that they have no plans for families… you get my point.  But then, that’s exactly what they want, don’t they?

Look, vote however you want, but have a good argument ready for when people ask about it or you just look like you’re towing the party line. Trust me, it’s OK to say you just don’t like the guy and his politics, but don’t sound like you’re reading from a cheat sheet from your party.

I remember when Obama was running for office and John Oliver of The Daily Show was out interviewing people at a McCain rally.  He asked one women why she wasn’t voting for Obama and she said, “Well, I’m concerned about the whole Muslim thing.”  Oliver responded, in his very British way, “So apart from the fact that he isn’t, what is it then?”

J.

Related posts:

1. Pizza Hut UK reminds me that things are just different here (Live from #SES London)
2. Mr. T tells the UK to get some nuts (live from #SES London)
3. Burger King UK commercials just as bad as in the US! (Live from #SES London)

Anyway, while on the walk, I took some shots of some local ads for the site. As you know, the point of this site is really to make fun of bad advertising, but damn it if I didn’t see any really bad ads around town.

For instance, here’s a great little transit ad for Pizza Hut:

The ad is part of a series of ads that are basically saying you don’t need a real excuse to order Pizza Hut, so things like the kids getting up on time or finding a seat on the bus will do.  Not an earth shattering campaign, but for outdoor, it’s not bad.

What I find funny about this ad is the glass of wine with the meal.  My friend Cindy saw that later when I pointed it out to her and she said, “who drinks wine with pizza, ew!”  Well, I guess you could, it is technically Italian food, but in the US we’re practically programmed to either eat it with beer or a soda, so I guess she’s not totally crazy.

However, my point is that in the US, if people saw a glass of wine with Pizza Hut on any ad, they would promptly freak the fuck out.  I can hear them crying now, “but… kids might see that wine!”, which of course means that Pizza Hut is corrupting American children, there are threats of a boycott, and boom, you’re back a picture of a Pepsi or whatever.

Frankly, I’m just amazed these brands do so well over here.  As I’ve said, despite what you may hear, the food over here is quite good, so you just want to shake people and say, “we’re sending you the cheap shit, go back to the kabab place!”

Anyway, this last photo isn’t really advertising, it’s a product, which given the origin of the character, you would think would be really popular in the US, but I’ve never seen these on the shelves before and I would have because, man, I love me a doughnut…

If you can’t read it, they’re “D’oh! Nuts”…

J.

PS – If you’re reading this at the show, come by the panel I’m moderating at 415 on “Search is the Display OS” and say hello.

Related posts:

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2. Mr. T tells the UK to get some nuts (live from #SES London)
3. Burger King UK commercials just as bad as in the US! (Live from #SES London)

Anyway, back to poking fun at ads in the UK, which is actually a little harder than in the US because they generally do create much better ads in the states and they’re not nearly so uptight about things like sex or whatnot.  I’m always amazed at how loose people from London actually are compared to the stereotypes about them we have thrust upon us in the States. Usually, we have this picture of these uptight, pain the ass kind of characters, but if you actually come over here, you know these people know how to party.  I mean, just look at all the bars and pubs over here, that should be your first clue.  Plus, the food isn’t anywhere near as bad as people paint it to be and I don’t care what folks say, the chicks are actually quite easy on the eye.

Here’s a good example in this ad from Snickers featuring Mr. T.

Now, someone told me that they did try to show this in the US, but they pulled it because it was too violent (it really isn’t at all) and because of the whole “nuts” thing. It must have been on some channels that I never watch, because I haven’t even heard anyone really discuss this ad back home.

This is actually part of a series of ads aimed directly at the male market. They even get a special, all Mr. T micro site that shows clips of guys working out at this crazy gym that uses old cars and such as weights. It’s a little over the top and the humor runs thin pretty quick, but I have to give them credit in at least trying to do an online tie in.

The campaign itself has it’s own Get Some Nuts YouTube channel, but the main commercials aren’t available there, just a bunch of interviews with Mr. T and some other goofiness that isn’t worth watching unless you’re 13 or just think like a 13 year old.

Here’s another one featuring a soccer player getting hurt on the field:

There’s spot with a speed walker that isn’t really all that funny, but I agree that the poof in the ad needs to knock that crap off and run like he’s got a pair.

It would be too easy for me to say that “I don’t get” why we can’t run the same ads that they get to run in other countries in the US.  Some of it has to do with our outdated, Puritanical views of things like sex, but more has to do with just approaching the right market with the right message… blah, blah, blah.  Frankly, in a time where people can find anything and everything, including the very commercials they skim by when they’re actually watching TV, you would think more brand would give the other,  more risque’ ads a shot on cable before deciding that we’re not hip enough in America for this cutting edge content.

Then again, what do I know… I’ve been on a steady diet of scotch and beer since I’ve arrived here and by tomorrow I could claim to be the King of England.

J.

Related posts:

1. Burger King UK commercials just as bad as in the US! (Live from #SES London)
2. Pizza Hut UK reminds me that things are just different here (Live from #SES London)
3. “I’ve never voted Tory before” ads in UK are ripe for abuse, fun (leftover from #SES London)

Anyway, you’ll be thrilled to know that, despite what many agencies and other folks that work in advertising like to say, the ads in the UK can suck just as much as those in the US.  I’m staying in Islington for the conference and there’s a great bit of raucous over the fact that they just built a new Burger King in this part of town, but frankly I think it’s because Burger King is running crap ads like this one:

The ad almost saves itself by being a little funny at the end with his buddy giving him crap for falling in the way he did and then asking him what he was listening to on his spy headphones, but it’s just not enough.

They introduce the spy thing right out of the shoot, which is a little overdone, and good thing they got to the fact that he was dropping into a Burger King early because otherwise, Brits would just be asking what the hell was going on with this ad.

However, for some reason they wait all they way until the spot is about to fade out before they say, “just 2.49, you’ll feel like you robbed us!” Really? That was the punchline after all that spy shit?

I know BK ads in the states are weird because, well, they have to do something to stand out from McDonald’s and just showing the food isn’t going to cut it against that monster.  McDonald’s advertises so much that if they ever pulled their business from an agency, it would be like a mill closing down in the mid-west. You would see creatives and media buyers selling smack or their bodies just to get someone to charge up their iPhones.  You know you’ve hit rock bottom in your career when you over to suck someone off just so you can check in on Foresquare.

What was I saying? Oh yeah, BK ads in the States are weird for a reason, but in the UK, I think it’s safe to just go back to showing that your burgers aren’t little, over fried pieces of crap like over at the Clown’s place.

I’m not going to bother going to BK over here unless they really go local and offer to deep fry me a whopper like they do at the chip and kabob places in Scotland…

J.

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