I actually like Ford as a car manufacturer, so I’m taking this series of stupid commercials kind of personal.

If you’ve read over this site before, you might have seen my rant on some of the goofy things they do in car commercials.  Coming up with a creative ad concept for  car commercial has got to be a pain, so most of the time I just give them a pass because there is only so much you can do.  However, neither one of these spots (or webisodes, I guess) actually pass the “hey, this is really friggin stupid” test.

The first is entitles Ford Fiesta vs. Lamborghini…

Between you and me, I friggin hate Lamborghinis.  They are mother expensive and frankly I just don’t like the way they look, but they sell a bunch of them and they go really fast in a straight line.  The goofy comparison tests show how the Lamborghini can’t turn like the Fiesta, but then again, it’s not supposed to either.  This would be like comparing how a hammer and a banana compare at driving nails; the latter just isn’t made for the task and to try and do the comparison just makes you look like a dipshit.

The second spot just hurts my damn head… it’s literally showing how the Fiesta comes in handy when zombies are present.

This spot breaks all kinds of rules in my book.

For starters, zombies are big right now, so you can actually hear someone asking during a pitch meeting, “Hey, what’s big right now with the kids? Zombies! Let’s put one in an ad!” That’s just friggin lazy and embarrassing.

Second, the ad is just dumb. That one chick clearly got away from the zombie, but somehow he is suddenly in her back seat? And how would being able to start the car faster help in that situation? He’s already friggin there!

Look, the Fiesta, the Yaris, and whatever else that thing in the ad is are those cheap, throwaway kind of cars you drive when you’re young and broke. Just letting people know that your car is more feature rich than the other pieces of crap will get people in the door. Trying to be clever like this in your ads and failing miserably will do nothing but gain the ire of your target audience, who friggin hate everything about you already because they’re young and know everything.

You want to sell cars to kids, go where the kids are and put your cars out. Don’t try to be hip or funny or clever… you just look like a ‘tard.

– Jeff Ferguson